so, of course when I start whining...(yes, sometimes I do stop!) I want new curtains, buy me a new rug, blah blah. I don't like this or that.... I get a good slap in the face.

the last time someone passed away that was related to me was back when I was Anna's age. My uncle died yesterday. I did not know him very well.you can read about him here. I do know that my aunt and he were retired and setting off to enjoy their golden years together. I know that it was unexpected and horrible. (a bad motorcycle/car accident) I know that even though my man and I are passionate people (that is just a nicer way of saying we are hot headed, stubborn, and tend to fuss at one another more often than we should) I want to spend the rest of my life and beyond with him. So I will TRY (until the next reality check) to love him and my kids, not get all crazy about retarded stuff. I am really trying not to raise my voice/ ok YELL at my kids so much. I hate that I do that. and hate is a bad word around here, so I have to really mean it to use it.

and in my last post when I mentioned a reason for lack of posts was bc I was cleaning more, that is really a big fat lie.